


Don't Jump

by samiekins17



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Depression, M/M, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-07
Updated: 2014-04-07
Packaged: 2018-01-18 13:41:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1430554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/samiekins17/pseuds/samiekins17
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A single phone call can change one's life forever. Shizuo finds himself in such a situation when he receives an unexpected phone call from an enemy. What he doesn't expect is the broken voice he hears on the other end.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don't Jump

The air was cool and the night seemed unnaturally calm. The residence of Ikebukuro knew that it was out of the ordinary, it even unnerved a handful of them. One man in particular had been waiting for something, anything to happen. Shizuo Heiwajima was rather on edge, mostly when he hadn't seen a particular informant broker in the last few days. The flea was a manipulative bastard who, Shizuo figured, was planning to stir up more trouble. It made perfect sense to him since no one had seen or heard from the informant in a while. The bleached blonde wasn't sure if he should be glad or worried.

He kicked an empty pop can along the sidewalk as he walked down the busy city street where everyone seemed to almost ignore his presence. There were a few who whispered about him but he paid them no mind. He was used to people talking about him. With his reputation there was no way to avoid it. It pissed him off when thugs would try and take him down since he really hated violence. The only problem was that he found himself in so many situations that required it. All of those who were on the receiving end had deserved it for one reason or another. Shizuo would never voice it but he actually was a good guy. He would never purposely hurt an innocent and he typically protected the city, minus the property damage now and then.

As a cellphone rang Shizuo stopped his movement forward and pulled the contraption from his pocket. As he glared at the unknown number he thought about ignoring it. Just his luck they would just keep calling until he answered or would leave an annoying message on his voice mail. With the thought of it possibly being important he decided to actually answer the phone and end the abrupt noise.

"Hello?" He asked one he finally answered the phone.

"You look rather small down there," The voice spoke on the other end. It sounded familiar but not at the same time.

"Who is this?" Shizuo spat as he looked up, trying to figure out where the person speaking was since he knew they had to be higher up then he was.

"I'm hurt you can't tell Shizu-chan."

"Flea?" Shizuo questioned not quite believing it. Something was terribly wrong, he could tell.

"Your words hurt me. No matter, nothing will make a difference in a few moments anyway."

"What are you talking about?" As soon as the words left his mouth he saw it. On top of the building across the street, Izaya Orihara was standing on the ledge of the rooftop. For a moment. Shizuo froze, not sure if it was a trick or the flea was going to jump.

"You see Shizu-chan nothing matters anymore. I don't even have the desire to mess with you."

"Then what is this? Is this some sort of sick joke?"

"Joke? Not even close. I just thought you'd like to witness your enemy's fall."

"That's not even funny."

"I'm not laughing." In fact Izaya sounded the completely opposite and it was making Shizuo uncomfortable.

"Stay there, I'm coming up," Shizuo voiced hoping for once that Izaya would actually listen.

The line went dead when he had entered the building. Shizuo figured Izaya must have hung up on him. He was sure he'd hear screaming if the flea decided to jump before he reached him from pedestrians on the street. Typically Shizuo wouldn't have cared what happened to the informant but the voice he had heard over the phone sent a chill up his spine and he remembered the man was human and if Shizuo knowingly let Izaya jump to his death he wouldn't have been able to live with himself. Even though Shizuo threatened to kill the flea repeatedly he'd never fall through with it. He wouldn't mention that fact to anyone but it was still true.

Believing the elevator would take up to much time, Shizuo ran up the stairs not caring how many there were. He had been used to such activity chasing Izaya throughout the city. Once he reached the roof he was glad to see Izaya still standing there. He was a bit nervous to see the man so close to the edge but if he were to rush out towards him Shizuo was sure the other would lean forward and embrace the fall.

"I never was able to understand you Shizu-chan. You're just so unpredictable. You say you hate me but here you are."

"Izaya-"

"No, just don't. After all I've done to this city, to you... I don't deserve your words. I don't deserve this life." Izaya voiced as he finally turned around to face Shizuo.

Out of all the years Shizuo had known the flea he had never expected to see him so broken. This Izaya was not the same flea that pissed him off on a daily basis. No this one was something frighting. Izaya looked so worn down, as if he just no longer cared about anything. Seeing the man like that made something click in the blonde's mind. In that moment all the hatred Shizuo held for Izaya was gone. All that was left was the desperation to get the man down from the ledge and toward safety.

"Please don't jump," Shizuo pleaded.

Izaya just let out a low empty chuckle before he shook his head. "The one day I threaten to end my life is the day you don't want me to. What an unpredictable protozoan."

"You don't have to do this."

"Have to do? You have no idea what I have to do or not. Even so I want to..."

"Izaya..."

"No Shizuo, you do not have a say in the matter." Actually hearing his name and not the pet name Izaya gave him made the blonde tense. Izaya never called him by that, at least never to his face. "This world is a cruel dark place and my existence makes it worse."

Almost as soon as the words left Izaya's mouth, Shizuo noticed a stray tear roll down the informant's cheek. Izaya was never one to show weakness, mostly in front of an enemy. At seeing the mess standing a small distance in front of him he could feel his heart-break. It was something Shizuo never expected to feel towards Izaya. No one, even the informant, didn't deserve to be in this condition and on the brink of suicide.

"Things can change, get better even."

"Not for me. There's no way to atone for everything I've done. I have to many enemies to just start over. It's impossible to wipe my slate clean." Shizuo could hear the pain in Izaya's voice. Then for a moment time seemed to still as Izaya took a step back, making the step to fall to his death.

"Izaya!" Shizuo called out in panic. He reached out and grabbed Izaya's arm before he could fall. A breath of relief escaped Shizuo as he pulled Izaya upright and off the ledge.

"Let go of me!" Izaya hollered as he struggled to get away.

"Not until I know you won't leap off the roof!" Shizuo nearly growled in frustration.

"That's not going to happen and who said you get to decided if I live or die? Isn't this what you always wanted?"

"Do you really think I could just stand here and watch you kill yourself? Even if I've despised your very existence all these years you're still human," Shizuo began. "Why did you call me, instead of just jumping?"

For a moment Izaya was silent and adverted his gaze from Shizuo. In those silent moments Shizuo was unsure what was running through the informant's mind or if his question would even be answered. It was hard to tell, mostly when Izaya was not himself. It was strange for the informant to be so quiet, mostly when asked a question. Even if Izaya hadn't known the answer to something he would still reply, usually with something witty, that could be rather believable.

"I...wanted on last reminder."

"Reminder?" Shizuo questioned before what Izaya was saying registered in his mind. "You're an idiot."

"What better motivation to end a life than listen to the person you had tormented, ruined, destroyed even. To hear that voice once more and remember what a terrible human you are. That those humans you love will never return that feeling, no one ever will. To discover how lonely you actually feel..." Izya stopped speaking as his words grew into strangled sobs.

Not quite sure why, besides the heavy feeling in his chest, Shizuo pulled Izaya toward him and wrapped his arms around him. He half expected ti get pushed away but instead Izaya clenched onto Shizuo as if he was the only thing keeping him upright. Shizuo felt his uniform dampen from tears that began to pour from the informant. He was rather unsettled by the display. Shizuo would have never in a million years expect to be comforting Izaya. It was another abnormality that could be added to their lives.

All those years that Shizuo had thought he hated Izaya but had he really? Sure the flea pissed him off constantly but if he remembered correctly he had never seriously hurt the other, even though he was pretty sure he could have. Even now, if he had really wanted Izaya dead he would have let him fall or would have pushed him off the ledge himself. Their fights, the cat and mouse chase that had gone on since high school was just a routine they had found themselves in. Now that Shizuo thought about it he was pretty sure his life would feel rather empty, maybe even boring, if Izaya wouldn't be in it any longer. At the realization, Shizuo's grip tightened around Izaya, feeling that if he let of the informant wouldn't be there anymore.

"It's not too late Izaya. You have friends who care about you. Things can change. Please just don't jump," Shizuo spoke calmly, a voice he had never used around Izaya before.

"How can you, of all people, say that? I've ruined your life on multiple occasions."

"Shouldn't that be a good enough reason to believe me?" Shizuo began as he tilted Izaya's face to look at him. His deep brown meeting Izaya's dull scarlet. "If I can forgive you for everything then so can everyone else."

"But... why? I though you hated me. That you wanted me dead?"

"That's the thing. I don't think I ever did. Sure you have pissed me off more times than I can count but I don't think it was ever more than that."

Shizuo saw the disbelief on the other's face and in that moment he wanted to erase the look from Izaya's face. It would have been hard for him to believe if the role's had been reversed but he still wished there was a way to get the other man to believe him.

"I hate how unpredictable you are." Izaya said before pulling back away from Shizuo slightly. "You never do what I expect you to. I guess that's what makes you different. You are the only person I could never control. That's probably why I found you so interesting. Why I tried so hard to break you."

Shizuo was a bit taken back by Izaya's words. He had always known how manipulating Izaya was. How the man always had to be the one in control of every situation. He just never understood how Izaya felt when he wasn't in control. Was this what happened when the man lost control of his own life and emotions? Shizuo didn't like it at all. He couldn't see how Izaya had gotten to the point where he'd rather die than try to fix things. Was he that far gone where he no longer saw another option for himself?

"Stay with me."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me Izaya. Come stay with me. Let me convince you that your life is worth living."

"Why would you do that?"

"Because the world and everyone in it isn't ready for you to leave it yet."

"You're ridiculous Shizu-chan."

"Please, just give me some time to convince you," Shizuo nearly pleaded as he began to grow both desperate and irritated.

Shizuo wanted to just throw the flea over his shoulder and leave the rooftop but thought better of it. Izaya would never agree to let Shizuo help if he did that. He was having difficulty being patient but that's what it would take. If he tried anything else he was sure Izaya would try to jump again.

"I don't-"

"Please just let me help."

Izaya was silent for a moment before speaking, "I'd never imagine Shizuo Hewijima would ever beg me to let him help me."

"Neither did I," Shizuo admitted. He never imagined they'd ever be having a conversation like this in the first place.

Before either of them could say another word it began to rain. Shizuo couldn't help but think that the weather had a bad sense of humor. The rain that began to pour down over them seemed to fit the current mood. If it had been any other moment both of them would have probably laughed. Now they were just standing there getting soaked in the rain. As Shizuo turned his gaze to Izaya he saw that he was once again by the ledge but just glance down below them.

"One chance Shizuo," Izaya said once again turning around to face him. "If you can't convince me then I will finish what I started." Izaya spoke, barely above the sound of the rain.

"Alright sounds fair," Shizuo agreed. He would try everything to prevent this situation from happening again.

Just when Izaya was about to take a step away from the ledge and head back down the building time nearly froze as a flash of lightning let up the sky that was followed quickly by a loud crash of thunder. Not having expected it the informant was rather startled and jumped at the sudden burst of sound. In the moment both men's eyes widened as Izaya lost his footing and began to fall backward.

"Izaya!" Shizuo shouted one last time as he reached out, not sure if he was fast enough to catch the other man in time.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, haven't posted anything for a while and I'm sorry about that. Life has been crazy. I'm sorry this one is a bit more angsty but I left the end hanging for a reason. Depending on feedback and if I can figure out where I'd like to go with it, this story might be continued. So please tell me if you liked it or not or maybe something you want to see next. I'm always up for some fresh ideas.


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